Tuesday, January 5, 2016

New Japan Pro Wrestling Thoughts From a Guy Who is Really Excited


New Japan Pro Wrestling (NJPW) is a promotion I only watched the big matches for prior to 2015. I'd watch the big Tanahashi, Okada, Chaos and Bullet Club stuff, but I never invested fully into the product. I just didn't have the time and I thought it would be hard to keep up on a weekly or monthly basis. I knew about the people like KUSHIDA, Kenny Omega (cause I've watched a fair bit of his DDT stuff), Ishii and Shibata, but never really fully got into their character or ring-work. Mostly cause of the time differential with me living in the US and the fact that they don't do a ton of shows in English. Though I have come to learn with NJPW, even not knowing any Japanese, the commentary and passion or even no commentary at all can be way better than English Announcers they bring in. Can we get JR to another Wrestle Kingdom or a G1 Climax please?


All of that only sparingly keeping up with NJPW changed when I watched Wrestle Kingdom 9 last year. It got me fully hooked to the whole roster and the talent exchange they do with Ring of Honor (ROH). To start off the year we got a PPV full of wrestling, emotion and passion that just couldn't be topped the whole year. Though I loved G1 Climax, Wrestlemania 31 and Ultima Lucha very much. Wrestle Kingdom 9 reminded me how I got into WWE all those years ago watching Wrestlemaina 19. But that's not to say it was easy to keep up with everything that goes on in a promotion that primarily doesn't speak my native tongue. I mean sure we get English promos from Kenny Omega pretty steadily or perhaps ones from the people in ROH. From what I've watched and I don't often get to catch PPV pressers, is that NJPW does all of their story-line building outside of shows, or at least most of the time that's where the talking happens. Sure you may get a challenge after win or the world champ will say speech at the end of a major PPV or match. But story-lines are built outside of the ring and settled exclusively inside of it. So getting used to the WWE, or I guess just Western style, of having everything spelled out for you, takes some getting used to.


Another big difference is that NJPW really focuses on the wrestling aspect of pro wrestling. They call it puroresu which roughly translates to "pro-wres." Most notably, in NJPW, you have "strong style" which was termed way back in the day. It's literally fighting spirit and incorporates a ton of traditional wrestling, kicks, strikes and martial arts, since a lot of NJPW's stars have MMA training and background. You also have the "King's Road" style which you're probably more used to if you've been watching the WWE. It focuses on holds, brawling and the storytelling aspect of pro wrestling. With the strong style you get faster paced matches that have a lot of fighting, counters, hard strikes and brutal stiffness. They can pack a ton of action into a 12-15 match that other promotions may take a 20+ minute match to convey.


You have Shawn Michaels, Stone Cold Steve Austin, The Rock, Brock Lesnar, John Cena, Hulk Hogan, Andre the Giant, Macho Man, etc as some of the big names in the history of WWE. They are larger than life names that everyone knows because WWE/F is a worldwide thing. But up until the last decade or so, it wasn't as easy to obtain shows or events from other countries so easily. WWE has used Japanese wrestlers, but it's another thing to be able to keep up with the best NJPW has to offer and they really can be considered the best wrestlers in the world. For the past year, as a fan of pro wrestling matches over the theatrics, I've come to realize while WWE and ROH can put on top tier matches, Rollins/Lesnar/Cena, Owens/Cena, Bayley/Banks, Styles/Lethal, any Young Bucks/reDRagon combo match. NJPW puts on one of these high caliber matches nearly every PPV. 


You're about to get a huge list of massive stars that competed in NJPW or in ROH throughout 2015. This year alone I've been enthralled with a shortlist of NJPW stars that include Tetsuya Naito, Kota Ibushi, KUSHIDA, Kenny Omega, Hirooki Goto, Tomohiro Ishii, Katsuyori Shibata, Hiroshi Tanahahi, Shinsuke Nakamura and Kazuchika Okada. Not to mention they've had stellar matches with aforementioned Styles and Omega all year. This doesn't even include the tag team work that Young Bucks, reDRagon, Ricochet (Prince Puma) and Matt Sydal, Roppongi Vice, Los Ingobernables, GBH (Togi Makabe and Tomoaki Honma), Doc Gallows and Karl Anderson, who have all been doing this month after month this past year.


There is a ton of history, Young Lions (younger stars in NJPW training their way up) and people I just don't know all that well putting on matches and working their ass off for our entertainment each and every NJPW show, not just the PPVs. They hold the Best of the Super Juniors, the World Tag League and the G1 Climax Tournaments, where "smaller" people like say Karl Anderson (who shone during the G1 Climax this year) or Michael Elgin (who shone during the World Tag League) are given a chance to go all out in front of the NJPW audience. Not to mention these week and month long star studded tournaments are usually held in high regard for everyone competing and a good way to catch up on some of the lesser known NJPW stars too.  I can't wait to learn more about the history of this illustrious promotion going forward.


Now I don't really want to end this on me only giving a run down of NJPW. I want to point out my favorite things about NJPW going right now and updated as of last night NJPW New Years Dash show. So if you're not caught up to that, then you may want to stop reading until you catch up with everything that happened.


I like the Never Openweight 6-Man Tag Team Championship, and The Briscoe Brothers and Toru Yano are the perfect first champions.

The Briscoe Brothers are great and their reckless brawling style with the more comedic style of Yano have worked pretty well in their first two matches between Wrestle Kingdom 10 and New Years Dash. The three have an obvious chemistry, and the promo they cut after the main event of  NYD was very endearing. The Briscoe Brothers cut a basic promo about coming into NJPW and right off the bat winning the tag team titles. The crowd seemed silent, so when they passed the mic to Yano to end the show he commented with "I bet none of you knew what they said, did you? No prob, I didn't either! But we've got a bond, heart to heart. You probably do, too!" which is fantastic.


The IWGP Junior Tag Team Championships are still awesome.

The Young Bucks are still awesome. Whether you like them or not they're one of the top tag teams on the planet. Even with Bobby Fish getting a little older, him and Kyle O'Reilly are one of the most smooth tag teams on the market. reDRagon is awesome. Combine that with Ricochet and Matt Sydal rising and putting on fantastic matches these three teams are still putting forth great matches I'll continue to enjoy. Though I do think they need to maybe push a team like David Finlay and Jay White into this picture as they had a good match with Ricochet/Sydal at NYD.


I like Los Ingobernables and Bushi vs KUSHIDA will be fun.

I thought Tetsuya Naito vs Goto at Wrestle Kingdom 10 was only okay. The bad guy charisma oozed out of Los Ingobarnables though and I love the villainous swag that Naito can bring to a match just by simply entering or exiting a match. Plus that scythe was awesome. KUSHIDA on the other hand had a fantastic match with Kenny Omega (and feud for that matter for a lot of 2015) and will now be dealing with Bushi as he challenged him for the IWGP Junior Heavyweight Championship.


Never Openweight Championship is awesome no matter who is holding it.

Ishii and Shibata could have matches like this every week and I will love every single one them. Pure brutality and a fresh face like Shibata holding the title will give us a new look at challengers going forward. And if they ever do a triple threat match for this title, they may have before, I don't know, it would be beautiful.


Okada is still my favorite and another match with Goto will be good.

Tanahashi and Okada delivered what may be match of the decade at Wrestle Kingdom 10. Guts, passion and overcoming were the themes as Okada finally got the Tanahashi monkey off his back. After the eight man tag Okada was in last night Goto challenged him. Okada is one of the top, if not the top guy, on the entire planet and Goto has had wars with the likes of Nakamura (and Okada himself). Here's how the match was likely set up last night at NYD. It's all you need to know.
Goto: "The Naito thing, that finished yesterday. Okada! I'm going to take that belt!"
Okada: "You're done with Naito? That's got nothing to do with anything! But I remember losing to you in the G1. Oh, I remember when you wanted to unify the IWGP and IC belts, let's do it! Oh right, you don't have the IC belt."

Kenny Omega is the best and people will FINALLY get to see it in the main event. 
 Don't you get me wrong, Styles, Okada, Nakamura and Tanahashi had incredible matches all year. But with the way Styles was excommunicated from Bullet Club by Omega last night and the defiant way Omega challenged Nakamura for the Intercontinental Championship, he's ready to explode. His heel persona is amazing and his ring-skills are on par with anyone I've named in this write-up. With all the crazy news breaking the last few days of Styles, Nakamura, Anderson and Gallows leaving to join WWE, they had to do something and boy was that something huge. Here's the video of it and it's going to tell you all you need to know about the Bullet Club going forward. Plus Kenny Omega vs Shinsuke Nakamura is going to be bananas.
New Japan is going to be awesome this year and I'm ready for it all!

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Sunday, October 18, 2015

The Future of Pro Wrestling is Still Bright


Pro wrestling, to those who know it, is a life bending phenomenon. No matter how good or bad it is, we tune in for the monthly pay per views, every Monday night for Raw and find the shows our favorite indie or foreign wrestlers are on, like Ring of Honor and New Japan Pro Wrestling. We stay up late, we watch too long, we invest in the characters, but most importantly, we invest in the wrestler themselves. This is my first time writing a formal-ish piece on professional wrestling, but this is my blog and I tend to review the things I watch on here. In 2015, I've really expanded my wrestling habits to more than it even was a few years ago. WWE Raw every week still (no matter how dreadful). NXT is now a must watch show that it wasn't a few years ago. ROH PPVs can be fun, while NJPW has some of the best matches you'll ever see. We also now have the superb Lucha Unerground, with the best combination, I think, of action, drama and overall storytelling. But like with any other sport, that's right sport, fight me, you have to look at the younger generation of stars that we will continue to watch for years to come. Like Le'Veon Bell, Dez Bryant, Mike Trout or Anthony Davis, pro wrestling has lager than life figures that equate to the young talent of these traditional sports' mega stars. So instead of me giving you a big list of "Best Shows" or "Best Matches" or the like, I want to run down four of the younger stars, below 30 years of age and why they're keeping the future of professional wrestling looking bright. The New Day (as well as Seth Rollins, just missed my top four, but I can assure you, that New Day does indeed rock.

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Bayley
26 years old
NXT
Active since April of 2008
NXT Women's Champion (current)

Pamela Martinez, or as you probably know her, Bayley, has taken NXT by storm. NXT is WWE's minor leagues, so to speak, and it has exploded in popularity over the past two years. But even with big name stars like Finn Balor, Samoa Joe, Sami Zayn and Kevin Owens setting up shop there for periods of time, I always go back to Bayley. You'd never know Bayley is a wrestler with her bubbly and infectious personality. But take a look at her life and you'll know she was born to do this. Growing up she wrote essays and poems in school, musing that one day she would hit the big stage. She worked her way through indie promotions, including Big Time Wrestling and Shimmer, from 2008 to 2012, before catching her big break with WWE.

In late 2012 she was signed by the WWE and then debuted in January of 2013 on the NXT roster. A far cry from the headband wearing woman we know now, she was trying to cultivate a luchador persona that never panned out. Later that year, in her television debut, she adopted the name Bayley and fought in a losing effort to current WWE main roster Diva (and first ever NXT Women's Championship), Paige. She evolved he character further in a first round tournament loss to Alicia Foxx, where her fandom cost her the match. It wasn't until that September that she won her first match, a tag team match, alongside Charlotte (another current main roster Diva and daughter of Ric Flair).

From there on out we can trace Bayley's journey to being one of the best young wrestlers trough a feud with Sasha Banks, who was with Summer Rae as the BFFs (Beautiful Fierce Females), Emma and Dana Brooke as well as bouts with Charlotte and Becky Lynch. Coming full circle, we're at present day. Two months removed from Bayley winning the NXT Women's Championship, from Banks, at NXT TakeOver Brookyln. We're also two weeks removed from Bayley defending said title against Banks in a 30 minute Iron(wo)man match at TakeOver Respect. Arguably the two most memorable and emotion filled women's matches of all time. TakeOver Brooklyn proved that WWE "divas" are indeed capable of main eventing shows. While TakeOver Respect proved that if you give them the main event spotlight, they will deliver a match of the year worthy bout. 

Bayley and Banks are the polar opposite of each other. Bright and cherry vs boss and chastising. Bayley character has endeared and engrossed us all over he past year. We've watched her become a legitimate threat in the division she is now the queen of. Instead of just being the fan-girl, she's now the one throwing Bayley to Belly hug-plexes. She'll hug you, but she'll also pin you. Her wacky waving inflatable arm flailing tube men, her bracelets and now her championship belt. Bayley has proven to be an endearing force in and out of the ring.

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Ricochet / Prince Puma
27 years old
NJPW / Lucha Underground
Active since 2004
Lucha Underground Champion, Lucha Underground Aztec Warfare, NJPW Best of the Super Juniors 2014

Sadly, for the most part, I did not know about Ricochet, real name Trevor Mann, until I started watching Lucha Underground last winter and was introduced to Prince Puma. In the first month of --me watching-- Lucha Underground season one, Puma had great matches with Johnny Mudo (as most people know him, John Morrison or Johnny Nitro). Impressive, I decided to look into the back log of his career.

Ricochet has wrestled everywhere. You name the indie promotion, he's been there. Pro Wrestling Guerrllia, Chikara, Dragon Gate (though that's technically not indie), Evolve, etc. He amassed championships and titles wherever he went, but it wasn't until NJPW in 2013 that people began to really notice him. By the time 2014 rolled around, he had won the Best of the Super Juniors tournament and was ready to be one of the biggest stars of El Ray's Lucha Underground.

From the start, you could tell that Prince Puma was going to be a fixture at the top of Dario Cueto's Lucha Underground promotion for the whole season. He won Aztec Warfare to become the inaugural champion and continued to hold and defend the title throughout the rest of season one. Having stellar title matches with Johnny Mundo, Mil Muertes, Hernandez and Drago throughout season one, Puma proved that despite his size, he was there to compete. Mundo and Puma had a match of the year contender with their Iron Man match for the title. While during Ultima Lucha, Muertes and Puma put on a show stealing match that left us all patiently waiting for season two of Lucha Underground.

Ricochet or Prince Puma, however you know him, has the great combination of speed, athleticism and ring knowledge to be at the top of wherever he's at. His 630 senton stands out as a finish to a match as well. It was reported that before Lucha Unerground season two was announced, WWE was interested in signing him. So that speaks to how highly he is regarded, since WWE has been scooping up a ton of the top indie talent in the past year. Luckily for us, we will get to see the conclusion of his feud with Mil Muertes next season and then who knows, maybe Ricochet will end up on the big stage at some point.

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Kazuchika Okada
27 years old
NJPW
Active since August 29, 2004
3x IWGP Heavyweight Champion (current), 2x G1 Climax (2012, 2014) and New Japan Cup 2013

Much like Ricochet, I've only begun to take notice of Kazuchika Okada (and a lot of other non-WWE wrestlers) this past year or so. The Rainmaker as they call him in NJPW has been tearing it up for years now in Japan and we're finally getting to see the beginning of the best of his talent. He was trained by Ultimo Dragon and spend his first year in NJPW, before leaving for a year to Total Nonstop Action (TNA) in 2010 for a year. In 2011 he returned to NJPW to begin working his way toward his first major event wins. 

Anyone who's kept up with NJPW these past two years has seen him grown, even just over the course of these past 10 months. If you're like me, you took notice of NJPW this year on January 4th when Wrestle Kingdom 9 aired. Live commentated by Jim Ross and Matt Striker, the show, from top to bottom, set the standards for the PPVs in 2015.

In a losing effort to obtain the IWGP Heavyweight Champion at the event, Okada and then champion Hiroshi Tanahashi delivered a main event that has stood up as one of NJPW best main events of the year. After the loss to Tanahashi, Okada began to breakdown and throughout the spring battled Bad Luck Fale. After vanquishing him, he began to challenge the new IWGP champion, AJ Styles. The two have had a terminus series of matches ever since. Both singles matches, tag matches and matches for the IWGP title. Over the summer at NJPW's Dominion 7.5 in Osaka-jo Hall, Okada finally put Styles down for the one, two, three and began his third IWGP Heavyweight title reign.

With his unmistakable charisma, his hard hitting style in the ring and a look that really does set him apart, Kazuchika Okada is going to be a major player in NJPW for years to some. His dropkick, if you have not seen it, please look it up, is a thing of beauty. The Rainmaker reminds me a lot of a young Randy Orton. Dripping with talent and eager to rise to, and stay at, the top. We'll all be lucky to watch him continue to reign as a champion in Japan for a long time to come.

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Sasha Banks
23 years old
WWE / NXT
Active sine August 8, 2010
Chatoic Women's Wrestling Champ, IWE Women's Champion, NXT Women's Championship

I have been watching Sasha Banks, real name Mercedes Kaestner-Varnado, ever since she first debuted on NXT in late 2012. She grew up a pro wrestling fan, idolized Eddie Guerrero and as soon as she could, began her training to become a wrestler. While she didn't have the prototypical look of a WWE "diva," she seemed like she had what it took to break the mold. She was good on the mic, good in the ring and even just an inkling of talent can go a long way, especially when you factor in that she was a month shy of turning 21 when she debuted. I went back to look at some of her pre-WWE stuff, it showed that she had the raw talent of someone destined to be the best at where ever she ended up.

Much like Bayley above, Sasha lost in the first round of he inaugural NXT Women's Championship tournament and essentially never looked back. She started off by being beaten by Paige in a NXT Women's Championship match, mostly due to the behest of Summer Rae to prove herself. A few weeks later, Banks beat Bayley with Summer Rae at ring side. After the match, Sasha anointed herself "The Boss" and soon formed the BFFs with Summer Rae. Throughout the year, the BFFs took down Bayley, Emma and Paige. That November, after the BFFs defeated Charlotte and Bayley in a tag match. Afterward, Charlotte turned on Bayley and aligned herself with the BFFs.

2014 rolled around an Banks and Charlotte (without Summer Rae) began a feud with Bayley. Eventually Banks and Charlotte split up. The two, alongside Paige, Becky Lynch and Bayley begin to have matches with each other. Eventually Charlotte and Banks began a feud for Charlotte's NXT Women's Championship. Banks lost two straight NXT TakeOver matches to Charlotte, to close 2014.

Finally, we come to this year, 2015, the year of The Boss. At the first NXT TakeOver event of the year, Rival, Sasha defeated Becky Lynch, Bayley and Charlotte to finally claim the NXT Women's Championship. Over the course of the year she successfully defended the title against Charlotte, Alexa Bliss and Becky Lynch. Heading into NXT TakeOver Brooklyn, after a stellar set of promos and lead up to her title defense against Bayley, the fruit of Banks' hard work came to fruition. In losing effort to Bayley, the two put on a show stealing match in front of the largest NXT crowd ever for the NXT Women's title. Then a few weeks ago, the duo topped themselves, and quite possibly had match of the year at NXT TakeOver Respect, the aforementioned Iron(wo)Man match.

Dare I say, but Sasha Banks may be the best overall wrestler currently in the WWE. Yes this is a roster with Rusev, Cesaro, Kevin Owens, Sami Zayn, Finn Balor and Samoa Joe on it. Banks oozes the charisma and venom it takes to be a top heel. She also backs it up with some of, if not the best, wrestling among the divas. Though you could argue Becky Lynch or Bayley are close. Sasha Banks is only 23 years old, she's recently been called to the main roster and is still undefeated in singles matches since being called up. It's only a matter of time before The Boss is giving everyone Bank Statements from the top of the main roster.

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Saturday, July 18, 2015

Ant-Man [A Fat Jesus Film Review]


Superhero films, especially ones that are going on in the current Marvel Cinematic Universe, can be put into to tiers in my eyes. The upper tier has The Avengers, Iron Man and Captain America films. While the lower tier has Guardians of the Galaxy, Thor and now 'Ant-Man!' I'll admit I was pretty skeptical of this film and thought it would be just be an okay film much like the two Thor films. Paul Rudd is great and Michael Douglas is a legend, but it was hard not to think that this could be the first of the MCU films to be underwhelming. Ant-Man, despite being an original Avenger in the comics, he's only now getting time to shine in the MCU. The wait was worth it as this pseudo origins story hearkens back to the fun of the first Iron man film, but on a much smaller scale.

'Ant-Man' follows the story of Scott Lang (Rudd), a thief who means well, as he is released from prison after serving a three year sentence. He begins to live with his old cellmate Luis (Michael Pena) and is genuinely interested in turning his life around. Flashback to 1989 and scientist Hank Pym (Douglas) is infuriated when he finds out S.H.I.E.L.D. is trying to replicate his Ant-Man shrinking technology. He believes that it is dangerous and needs to be suppressed. Back to present day and Lang is having trouble finding work, Luis gets a tip that there's a millionaire that will be gone from his home for a week. Lang caves and he and his crew begin to rob the house, which turns out to be Pym's. After cracking the safe in the basement, Lang only finds the Ant-Man suit and takes it. The next day he puts it on and shrinks himself and --with Pym in his ear-- takes a tumble from his apartment all the way to the street. That night, while putting the suit back in Pym's house, the cops are called and he is arrested. Knowing that if he goes back to prison, he'll never see his daughter again, Lang is in a bad place, until Pym visits him and gives him one more chance and the suit. When Lang escapes he is informed that Pym's protegee Darren Cross (Corey Stoll) has weaponized the Ant-Man formula (now Yellowjacket). Pym's estranged daughter Hope van Dyne (Evangeline Lilly) is his right hand man. Now Lang and Pym must team up to get the YellowJacket suit and keep Cross from giving it to the wrong people.

This film may not be on par with some of Marvel's best superhero films of the past couple years, but it's also easily one of the most fun films in all of the MCU. Ant-Man is an absurd concept when you look at it. The ability to shrink down and have the comparable strength of ant is awesome. But, that's not where things end. Not only does Lang have the strength of an ant, he also has the power to communicate and control ants. This is demonstrated all throughout the film in some of the most fun sequences in the film. From Lang learning about all the different types of ants, running underground with them and then eventually using them in this heist, we get to see it all. Flying around on 'Antony,' using fire ants as a raft or ladder or flying in a swarm like an attack squadron are only some of the ways we see Ant-Man's abilities. These are some of the most fun and innovative points in 'Ant-Man' and we're just scratching the surface. The CGI overall is pretty good, I opted not to see this in 3D, but I can't help but think the 3D is probably pretty solid in this. The shrinking is seamless and looks good. When small the world around looks fantastic, everything doesn't just look "big" and you feel like you're running through a field or in an ant colony or inside of a computer. The combat while small is a high point as well. Lang jumping around slamming thugs, the fight with Falcon (Anthony Mackie) and the final fight with Yellowjacket are done superbly. Not to mention the trippiness that came with Lang going subatomic later in the film. Full of action blended with great humor, Ant-Man's comedy is on par with any of the other Marvel films, but less reliant on "one-liners and out of place puns. Thomas the Tank engine's cameo is hilarious.

I'm still not quite sure how much of Edgar Wright's original script, before he left, made it into the film, but there are a lot of parts, especially the humor, that you could tell was crafted with some care. With the amount of different writers going into this final script Wright, Adam McKay, Joe Cornish and Paul Rudd, I was skeptical of how everything would flow and how the overall story would end up. Luckily, the heist angle, the origins of Lang becoming Ant-Man and the father daughter story lines between Lang and Cassie and Pym and Hope all came across pretty well. The overall heist angle comes across as an 'Oceans 11' type story, which is pretty fun. As I mentioned above, Lang becoming Ant-Man and learning how to use the suit is some of the best parts of the film. While the father/daughter story lines aren't fully fleshed out between everyone, the heart was there and watching the progression throughout the film is pretty good. The acting is a big reason everything worked so well. Paul Rudd is perfect for this role and fits the style of Scott Lang well. His subordinates, who include Michael Pena and T.I., are pretty great comedic relief throughout the film. I'm looking forward to more Michael Douglas as Hank Pym and Evangeline Lilly as Hope van Dyne (aka Wasp) as they play their roles expertly. Even Corey Stoll plays a solid, albeit one note, performance as David Cross. The writing and effort by the cast make this a film that will surprise a lot of people. The ending, mid and post scenes left me giddy for 'Captain America: Civil War' as well.

'Ant-Man' is a film that doesn't break new ground in the superhero genre, but does everything so well it's hard to find any glaring problem. The film is slow starting, but once it kicks in, it's a fun ride. Paul Rudd and Michael Douglas are a team that works so well together. Alongside Evangeline Lilly these three keep the films story rolling at a good pace. The story itself is fun, fast paced and everything you could want out of a Marvel film, all packed into just under two hours. Like with most of Marvel's films at this point, it's probably not going to win over any new fans. But, if you're into the Marvel Cinematic Universe, are hyped for 'Captain America: Civil War' next year, and want a fun film to tide you over, then 'Ant-Man' is perfect for you. Oh, and don't forget, Baskin Robbins always finds out.


Friday, June 19, 2015

Jurassic World [A Fat Jesus Film Review]


Let's face it. If you were a kid growing up, which I think we all were, you went through a dinosaur phase. You drew pictures of them, you had your favorites -- velociraptors and ankylosaurus for me -- watched 'The Land Before Time' and pretended to be T-Rex's (walking around with your arms tucked in roaring). Unfortunately, when you get older it's harder to be as enthusiastic about dinosaurs. This is why we have the Jurassic Park series. Even though "The Lost World" and "Jurassic Park III" exist. 'Jurassic World' is the fourth installment in this series and stars Chris Pratt, Bryce Dallas Howard and The Kingpin, err, I mean, Vincent D'Onofrio. While lacking the pure wonder that the original film gave us, it more than makes up for its one-note characters with dazzling dinosaurs that are more than just the backdrop to the story.

'Jurassic World' is set 22 years after the events of 'Jurassic Park.' InGen, the company that cloned the first dinosaurs, has successfully opened a theme park called "Jurassic World." One day, operations manager Clare Mitchell (Dallas Howard), has two of her nephews, brothers, Zach and Grey Mitchell (Nick Robinson and Ty Simpkins), visiting the park. Though she is too busy to be with them during the day, they plan to meet up later in the evening. In order to drum up attendance, InGen created a genetically modified dinosaur with the genes of a bunch of different predatory dinosaurs as well as present day animals, Indominus. Meanwhile, at a different part of the park, Owen Grady (Pratt), a former Marine, has just finished a successful training session with his velociraptors. After the session, InGen's head of security, Vic Hoskins (Vincent D'Onofrio), tries to convince Owen that the raptors would be perfect for military use. The park owner, Simon Masrani (Irrfan Khan) orders Owens to go check out the Indominus' enclosure, to make sure it's ready for visitors. Clare and Owen head to the exhibit, only to find that they weren't getting a heat signature from Indominus and that there are giant claw marks on one of the walls. While Owen and two guards are checking out the claw marks, it is discovered that Indominus is still in the enclosure and that she is masking her heat signature. Owen and one of the guards escape, but in doing so, so does Indominus. Now the park must find a way to stop Indominus, because it's putting not only the lives of the other dinosaurs in danger, but the people in the theme park as well.

I'm going to start right out and say it, I wasn't a fan of the first 20 minutes or so of this film. I understand you have to set up characters, but almost nothing of values happens during this time frame. I don't need to see a family take their kids to the airport or them riding on a boat across the ocean to the island. This could've been plausible if there was any meaningful dialogue, but there's not. Once they get to the island, Claire is introduced and finally Owens and Hoskins start getting screen time, the film sets into a good, albeit one note, pace. The characters are almost lifeless and that's not a good thing. Chris Pratt is a charismatic and hilarious actor (see 'Guardians of the Galaxy' and 'Parks and Recreation'). Bryce Dallas Howard has shown she has acting chops ('The Help' and '50/50'). Vincent D'Onofrio has a stupendous role in 'Marvel's Daredevil.' Even Ty Simpkins has had great roles in the 'Insidious' series and 'Iron Man 3.' So the lack of good writing really hurts this pretty well rounded cast. Even so, the characters, though dull, do serve a purpose throughout the film. The brothers get into jungle hi-jinx, causing their aunt to enlist her "will he, won't he" boy toy to go save them (and the rest of the park, I guess). All this is while the evil corporation is plotting a take over, well, more preservation, of the dinosaur's DNA when all the poo hits the whirling fan blades. The story is tired, but you didn't come to this for story, I didn't come to this for story -- but at least it wasn't completely terrible -- we came for dinosaurs, and boy did we get dinosaurs. Side note, Claire was running around through a jungle all day and a theme park all night, all while wearing high heels. Like full on sprinting, running, ducking, hiding, etc. Come on man. Come on.

The CGI in this film, the action and the use of dinosaurs themselves in the film really did save it for me. I love theme parks and the idea of one revolving around actual dinosaurs is an awesome idea, vision, dream, whatever you wanna call it. 'Jurassic Park' did this, but not to the kind of "theme park" I always picture, like Six Flags or Universal Studios. So seeing it actually come to life in this film is freaking awesome! I want a Jurassic Park or World t-shirt that I paid $40 for, while I walk around in my triceratops hat, personalized with my name on it. I want to go see Free Willy aka The Mosasaurus pop out of the water to engulf a shark. I want to be a kid again (somehow) and go into a petting zoo and ride a baby triceratops or pet a baby apatosaurus. The idea an execution of the theme park side of this film is actually awesome. I was entranced once the brothers reached the island and actually started going around the park. The flip side of things is the awesome CGI that was used for the dinosaurs. I recently re-watched 'Jurassic Park' and the CGI and models used in 1993 weren't half bad. But the CGI in this film is done pretty well. It felt like Chris Pratt was besties with his raptors. It felt like a fight when Indominus was tearing through the jungle killing it's prey. You even got a little sad when one of the apatosaurus dies in Owen and Claire's hands. On the flip side, the brutality is in full force. For a PG-13 film, I wasn't expecting to see as much dino on human violence. Humans were being picked up by pterodactyl, eaten whole and stomped on by the Indominus and torn to shreds by raptors. Boy, did I love every second of it too! I'm glad they didn't shy away from the fact that these are dinosaurs whose first instinct is to kill and hunt prey. Not to mention the final act of 'Jurassic World' is a pleasure to watch and is well worth sitting through the first half hour of so. I was enthralled.

'Jurassic World' isn't going to win over any fans. Unless you're there for Chris Pratt. Chris Pratt isn't going to make any new 'Jurassic World' fans, but this is a great effort for what is a reboot, sequel, a requel! The story is only okay, the acting, despite the awesome cast, is one-dimensional. But the dinosaurs, kicking ass and taking names is a beauty to watch. It's a pretty long film, at just over two hours, but if you can get past the first part of the film, everything gets better. The music is on point throughout, and I had to hold back yelling "Dododododo-Dododododo!" when they first panned to the island. If they can get the writing better, I have high hopes for the next 'Jurassic' film. As long as it's not some weird romantic comedy involving Chris Pratt, Bryce Dallas Howard and talking dinosaurs. 'Jurassic World' is still, I think, well worth the watch.


Inside Out [A Fat Jesus Film Review]


When I saw the first teaser trailer for 'Inside Out' I was already in love with the film. Pixar, the voice actors, the premise, everything screamed "Pixar is back!" The more trailers that came out, the more I was intrigued how Pixar would actually pull off this concept of watching a girl's emotions grow with her. How Pixar would replicate the feeling you or I had as a child effectively. Finally how a story, set inside of a mind and the real world, would come across to an audience. Pixar is at it's finest with 'Inside Out.' Bottom line. So when I popped on my 3D glasses (Hey, they upgraded us for free so I went with it), I embraced the joy of sadness, anger, fear and disgust. 

'Inside Out' follows the story of 11-year-old Riley Anderson (Kaitlyn Dias) and her emotions Joy, Sadness, Anger, Fear and Disgust (Amy Poehler, Phyllis Smith, Lewis Black, Bill Hader and Mindy Kaling). Riley's emotions control her memories and are charged with reacting to her circumstances. Her memories are housed in spheres, with her most important ones, "core memories," running the five biggest aspects of Riley's personality. Riley and her parents (Diane Lane and Kyle MacLachlan) have just moved to San Francisco from Minnesota, where Riley had lived her whole life. Joy tries to keep Riley happy and positive, but one day Sadness touches an orb and turns a happy memory into a sad one. Later, on the first day at her new school, Sadness makes a core memory of Riley crying. When Joy tries to dispose of it, the other five cores get knocked out of their container. Before Joy can put them back in, Joy, Sadness and the memory cores are sucked up into a memory tube and they land in the vastness of Riley's mind. It's now up to Joy and Sadness to return the memory cores, while Anger, Fear and Disgust try to hold down the fort, as Riley is going through one of the toughest times in her life.

It's hard to review a film like this because we're all going to interpret everything going on in a different way. Much like memories, there's always bigger picture than just an isolated moment of joy, sadness or anger. That's what I think the real appeal to Pixar's 'Inside Out' is, the wide range of everything we feel while we're watching it. The story is one of Pixar's best, and proves once again, that an animated film, targeted at kids can be enjoyed and related to by people of all ages. Yes, this film's target audience in kids, but its story and message is for everyone. We all have these emotions, we all struggle, or have struggled, with getting them under control in our lives, whether we're 10 or we're 40. This is the story of Riley truly getting her emotions in order for the first time after a hard move and an even rougher settling in. While the story of a little girl moving from Minnesota to San Francisco may sound dull, we are given a joy-ride, so to speak, as we watch her emotions try to keep her going. Emotions are a hard thing to nail down in a story, especially in a "kid's film," but Pixar does well. Chalk full of moments of genuine laughter, happiness and sadness, 'Inside Out' will hit you in all the right places, while making you smile or tear up at a moment's notice.

Don't give all the credit to the incredible story, the voice acting and animation are the two other points that help 'Inside Out' stand out from other animated features. This film is beautiful, I set out to see it in 2D, but the theater upgraded our tickets to 3D for free. The 3D is done well and doesn't detract from anything and is quite fine if you're into that sort of thing. The real world is animated in a way that really reflects how Riley sees the world. During the more happy parts, the world outside is bright and full of life. During the more emotional scenes, the world around her is more grey and dreary. I love this touch, because we get to see how emotions can affect how we feel about the world (as a whole) around us. When we get inside of Riley's head, the brain is made up of memory spheres, where everything from Riley's life stored. Her dominant personalities have five pronounced area that are controlled by core memories. At the center is the control room of Riley's brain, where Joy, Sadness, Anger, Fear and Disgust live and work. There is also a large pit below all this, where memories deemed "obsolete" are thrown to disappear. As well as places that regulate her imagination, dreams, subconscious, etc. I love that not only are her emotions in a tangible place, but all the things we deem as thought process (like dreams or forgetfulness) are made into a seemingly giant theme park that all resides in out minds. It makes everything more accessible for children, while giving older people a glimpse into how a younger person may actually see their minds working. I loved the design of everything, from the french fry trees in Imagination Land, to the awesome absurdness of traveling through your own Abstract Thoughts. 'Inside Out' is a wonder to behold. The character design is also flawless. Right from the get go you get the fire out of Anger's head, the jitters constantly coming off of Fear and the glow that radiates from Joy at all times. It really does help overall that the character design (for everyone) had that personal, genuine feel to it. 

Not only does the look and story mesh well, the voice acting is top notch from start to finish. It helps an animated film to have a set of voices people know. This is one of those films where the lead is someone we're probably all familiar with in Amy Poehler ('Parks and Recreation') with great support from people who aren't big name stars, but stars nonetheless. Phyllis Smith, from 'The Office,' is one of the biggest surprises, not only character-wise, but on the voice acting end as well. Poehler and Smith mesh so well as Joy and Sadness. The exuberance that Poehler brings as Joy is counter-measured, during almost every exchange of dialogue, with Smith's Sadness. The two begin to work together as a team to save Riley. They get some help from Bing-Bong, Riley's old imaginary friend who is a cotton candy, cat, elephant, dolphin who happens to cry tears made of candy (voiced by Richard Kind). Poehler, Smith and Kind form a trio out in the far reaches of Riley's mind and make for a great sounding trio that conveys each of their personalities well. Anger, Fear and Disgust are hardly the focal point of the emotions, but have their share of the film as they struggle to help Riley get through the days with Joy and Sadness gone. Bill Hader is pretty good as Fear. He really does make Riley fear things, albeit it in a highly exaggerated way that some might find over-done. Mindy Kaling is okay as Disgust, but her character is really the fifth wheel of the five. Kaling, also of 'The Office' and 'The Mindy Project' fame, doesn't get to show off how funny she can really be. Finally, the last of the emotions left to try and keep Riley afloat, Anger. Anger is voiced beautifully by one of the loudest and angriest comedians of the last decade, Lewis Black. Black was made for this role and his angrily delivered lines, one liners and motivation -- for one of the bigger points of the final act -- and is a really great fit for this film.

This is one of the best films of the year and I'm positive it will stay in my top five of 2015 come the end of the year. 'Inside Out' is a wonderfully designed Pixar film that you could argue is as good, if not better, than the likes of 'Up' and 'Toy Story 3.' The film runs about a hour and thirty-five minutes, but you're not going to be checking the time if you watch this film. The music is wonderfully Pixar, hitting all the right notes to make you laugh or cry in a given moment. Amy Poehler and Phyllis Smith headline this group or tremendous voice actors in a story we've seen elements of before, but never in this context. Kids will see it as a great film, with lots of laughs and fun, colorful characters in a vibrant world. Adults will see this and it will make them nostalgic and misty eyed toward the memories in their own lives. 'Inside Out' is a highly emotional ride with Joy, Sadness, Anger, Fear and Disgust, that will make you laugh as much as it makes you feel.